Monday, August 13, 2007

Day 172 - 162.8 Bad Sunday, Kindergarten Monday

Thank you all for your well wishes. Luke had a rough day Friday at home with my mom, but Friday night slept great and Saturday he was much better, and yesterday he was back to his old jolly self.

And, yes Vickie, now I have a sore throat and feel puny today. My husband and daughter don't have it yet, and man I hope it skips them.

I had a really bad day yesterday. Partly PMS, partly this sore throat thing starting, partly food induced. I ate badly Saturday and Sunday, and I wanted to just crawl in a hole because of the PMS. I've not had it this bad in a long time. Days like that, I can tell I'm completely off of antidepressants.

When I was on Lexapro, I'd feel a bit of a blip once a month, but could still function. Yesterday I wore my nightgown all day (which, I am happy to report, is a size Medium Ralph Lauren that my husband bought me in March for our anniversary and it finally fits), didn't take the kids to church, didn't brush my teeth or shower until 6 p.m. My husband took Sophie for the afternoon, so I napped while Luke napped, for 2 hours. I read my new book (Marian Keyes Anybody Out There? which I'm really enjoying. I finished Literacy and Longing in L.A. on Saturday--highly recommend it.) and sat Luke in front of the TV with his toys after he woke up.

And the not eating right and not getting any exercise has to make it all worse. I didn't make it to the gym all weekend, and only worked out Wednesday last week. I am not beating myself up about it--I have done the best I could with all the insanity going on. I'm just stating that when I'm off my routine, it contributes to feeling lousy.

So, despite feeling poorly today, I will go to the gym, even if it's only for a walk this afternoon. And I am back on my food plan, writing everything down. I'm going to LAWL today to weigh in, and will surely show a gain because my period is just barely starting (why does it take 4 days of spotting before I start? I may be in the early stages of perimenopause, do you think? I'm 37) and because of my salt/sugar/carbs/no veggies fest from the weekend.

Oh, and Sophie started Kindergarten this morning! She was so nervous, and last night we talked for an hour before she went to sleep, about how she's not ready, she can't skip, she doesn't know how to spell, doesn't know her all her letters, is afraid she won't make friends, is afraid there will be bullies, is upset she's not going back to Montessori (her preschool for 3 years). She cried and I held her and reassured her.

And this morning she was up at 6:30 like a big girl ready to go (normally, this child sleeps till 8:30 or 9 if I let her). My husband and I took her to school together (with Luke in the stroller), and she was okay until it was time for us to leave, then she started looking scared. I told her to look around--the other kids were probably scared too (one child was crying, poor thing), and Mrs K would help her and the others through their day. She was okay then, sitting on the big octagon rug, in front of a rectangular piece of construction paper with her name on it. I didn't cry, although I was close to it.

Here's to a better week!


ws said...

I hope your day is going well. the scale is just a number, or so I keep telling myself. I'd like to have the problems of a Kindergarten-er - specifically "I can't skip." then again I was basically a flunky until college and was never concerned about it.

Lori said...

Aw, you did a great job reassuring Sophie and keeping a lid on your own feelings while you were taking her to school. You're such a good mom!

I hope you feel better and you shake off that virus. (Maybe you won't feel like eating? I know, I'm being bad!) Get well.