Tuesday, September 30, 2008

147.6 - Almost October, AKA The Last Day of September

It's unbelievable to me that tomorrow is October 1st.

October is bitter sweet for me.

I love this time of year. Cooler temps, changing fall leaves, sweaters & jeans. It's the best time of year to run and be outside, IMO.

Halloween is fun for the kids, of course, and we always have an adult Halloween party with our friends so the grown ups get to play too.

Luke's birthday is the weekend after Halloween, so that's more fun to anticipate.

But it also marks that "the year is almost over" milestone for me.

We have to start planning our client Christmas party.... already. We will be talking about who in the family will be hosting Thanksgiving within the next few weeks. And retailers will be putting out Christmas decorations soon.

I'm a big planner--I like to know what's next, all the time. I'm not very good at living in the moment and so it's no wonder when October 1st hits, I'm already thinking about Christmas.

But this year, I'm going to need to work harder than ever to NOT live in the future. It's too uncertain for me right now. And truly, I suppose the future is always uncertain. I'm just unusually aware of that today.

Rather than thinking "tomorrow is October 1st" I need to relish in "today is September 30th." It's going to be a stretch, I think, but if nothing else I've learned in the past two years that I can grow and change.

As the wise old master Turtle in "Kung Fu Panda" reminds us....
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift. That's why they call it the present.

Monday, September 29, 2008

148.6 - I'm here, but not much good for anything

My weekend was not so great. Sophie was semi-better, dizzy Saturday morning but mostly OK by the afternoon and pretty much dizzy-free on Sunday. I took her to school at 9:30 today and even though she was tentative, she stayed. I haven't heard from school yet and it's 1:30. I did tell them not to let her play outside so the sunshine didn't get to her dizzyness.

Mark had to work on a paper for his class all day Sunday, he even missed church, so I had the kids pretty much glued to me all day and night. So no run. I was exhausted anyway and not sure that I could have managed 10 miles mentally even if I'd had free time.

I also went off plan yesterday, day 25 of the crack the fat loss code diet plan. It started at lunch with one piece of pumpkin bread at Bob Evans (I had a healthy salad, too), and then pretty much spiraled out of control after that. Today I'm back to it, doing a carb down day, planning on plugging right along back on track.

I'm pretty much out of words I can use right now because of the House voting down this financial package. So, instead of saying anything else, I'll just sign off for today.

EDIT MONDAY NIGHT:
After the markets closed (while Sophie and I were at the dentist--$196 for two teeth cleanings! Eee gads, we may move to once a year visits), I had pretty much determined I was going to go to Target and buy ice cream and cookie mix and eat my way through a batch of chocolate chip cookie dough. I talked with my mom on the phone, whined a lot, picked up Luke, and headed for Tar-jay.

But at the last minute instead of turning left to the store, I went straight and headed for home. It was mostly because I just didn't have it in me for a trip to the land of "Mommy can I haves?!" and not because I'd suddenly decided I wasn't going to wallow in a sugar comma.

When I got home, though, things slowed down. I left my clothes on instead of changing into loose loungy clothes like I usually do, and I realized--do I really want to NOT fit into these cute little (key word) J. Jill jeans in a week? So I nuked a sweet potato instead of eating junk. But then by the time it was done, I didn't want it either (healthy, yes; on plan for a carb down day at 6 p.m., no). I cooked a batch of crack slaw to freeze for lunches, and then ate tuna salad & broccoli slaw with a side of asparagus for dinner. I put in extra broccoli slaw with my tuna so I'd have lots to chew and chew and chew. And now I'm stuffed.

And thankful I found this tonight. Now I just have to put the "not worrying" into practice.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

148.2 - Saturday Ramble

I don't normally post on Saturdays unless I do something remarkable, like run a long run.

But I'm up early thanks to the boy getting up at 6:30 (he apparently didn't get the memo that Saturday's mommy gets to sleep in), and felt like posting a brain dump.

Food was OK yesterday for a carb up day. I ate a bit too much California Pizza Kitchen white pizza last night, but I wasn't over stuffed, just mildly stuffed. That's the thing about those kinds of foods, at least for me--it's hard to know when to stop. Maybe it's because it takes more time to eat your way through a big salad and real protein, and the brain catches up with the stomach in time to say okay, you're full. I pretty much inhaled the thin crust spinachy cheesey goodness in about 90 seconds.

I did get a run in yesterday. Only 3.11 miles, but it was enough. The weather was gorgeous. Really strong breeze, cooler (not cool, but not hot, very Goldilocks) air, and a warm sun going down in the west. I just ran to run. No time goal, so my first couple miles weren't fast. My third mile, though, I guess the endorphins had kicked in early, so I ran hard and averaged around a 9:50 pace (I can't remember exactly what Garmin said and the battery is low so I'm not checking it. Gotta run a long run this weekend, and my charger is at the office).

Speaking of that long run, I need to do 10. My half is only 2 weeks away (!). When I am going to find over 2 hours to run, I have no idea. I knew last night I was going to be too tired to go this morning. Plus DH isn't much of a morning person so I figured I better not even try because if Sophie got up sick, they'd all be lost without Mom around (pathetic, but it's true). Maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow morning before church if Sophie's well today, maybe tomorrow night. I hate not having a plan, because that's usually when things don't happen.

The rest of the weekend.... we're supposed to go to an ALS (Lou Gerhig's Disease) Walk this morning downtown, if Sophie's not dizzy. Should be great weather and they have clowns and a bouncehouse so it will be fun for the kids. DH has a paper to write for a class he's taking, and I have the usual laundry and other chores to get done. Then church tomorrow morning and probably lunch out with our friends after. That is, if Sophie is well. Can't go anywhere if she's dizzy.

My food this weekend is "baseline" days, when I get two starches, one at breakfast and one at lunch. My mid morning & afternoon snacks are protein (a chocolate protein/coffee shake in the a.m., tuna salad w/broccoli slaw in the p.m.) and dinner is protein/veggie/fat. Then I can have a protein shake or SF jello for my evening snack. Nothing exciting, but no deprivation either.

Yesterday I was noodling on my weight and body. Will I be satisfied at 145? I think I might. Probably closer to 141-142 will be my goal, so I have a few pounds uptick room. But I will hopefully get there over the next 4 weeks on this diet plan (may or may not happen--that's still a good 6 pounds away and that may not be possible and it may take another go round of the losing phases). My size 8s are getting loose, and the few 6s I have are mostly fitting. If I get down to the 130s, I'll have to buy a whole new wardrobe. And as fun as that sounds, we just don't need to be spending money on clothes right now.

The important thing is that I think I look OK in a loose size 8. And it's the I think/feel that I look okay--not how I actually look-- that's important here. If I can maintain that, then I'll be a happy camper at my happy weight.

Okay, 'nuff ramblin' today. If you've stopped by on the weekend, I hope you are enjoying yours. Hug your loved ones and yourself.


***Sophie's Story***for those of you who don't know the scoop on her dizzy stuff
Sophie is still sleeping, so I'm not sure of her status. She was better by yesterday afternoon, which is the normal pattern of things on the dizzy front. She has been having dizzy/vertigo spells since she was 2 and 1/2. We've done lots of tests--EEG, MRI, CT scan. Seen a pediatric neurologist off and on the past 4 years. Seen an ENT, had special ENT tests run. At first the doctors thought it was complicated migraines, until she had a bout last October that went for 2 weeks. We really thought she might be over them, since the last one she had in May this year was only 1 day. But obviously, we're not. And like I said the other day, it's possibly linked to sinuses/allergies/congestion/virus. But once they start, we don't know how to stop them. The anti-dizzy meds--antivert and the like--don't work. Right now I'm trying to dry her up with zyrtec and benadryl. We'll see if it helps.

***
Spell check's not working? Oy, what did blogger do now? =)

Friday, September 26, 2008

147.8 - TGIF

This has been an absolutely hillacious week. One day, I feel fine and secure. The next I'm sure we are headed for disaster. Normally my roller coasters are self-induced (from hormones, food, internal drama, whatever). But I want off this freaking "bail out" ride. It's awful.

Okay, anyway. Enough of that. I'm happy to report Sophie is at school, even though she was dizzy for a bit this morning and I took her in at 9:30. She is quite congested and may have the beginning of an earache, and like I told Vickie, I think it's quite possible her dizzyness this time is related to allergies/congestion. I'm going to give her benadryl at night and change her daily claritin to zyrtec (why oh why don't they make a generic zyrtec yet? gads, it's expensive).

Since she was with me all day and didn't feel great yesterday afternoon, we didn't go to swim class and I didn't get to run. I need a run. I really, really need a run.

This afternoon my mom is getting the kids, and if all goes well I'm going to run until I can't run anymore. I got a new fuel belt a week or so ago, the kind with four 8 oz bottles, and it is a dream for long runs (I broke it in on my 8 miler last weekend). It fits snugly and comfortably and I don't even notice I'm wearing it. Unless I catch a glimpse of my reflection and then I go, oh yeah, you look like a total running geek, but whatever. It's better to feel good than to look good when you're running.

Today is a carb up day, too, and unlike my last couple of carb up days, I'm not all "YAY I GET TO EAT A BUNCH OF JUNK FOOD!" Yes, I'm going to eat heavier carbs today (regular wheat bread, a cookie or three, probably some fun food at our friends' tonight). But I have an entirely different mind set about it today.

Why? I'm not sure. Maybe because I don't feel as deprived as I did those other days. I've got a few of these carb up days under my belt, and I know that another one is always just a few days away. I don't feel like I have to eat every sweet I crave in one single day. And most definitely because I don't want to go up another 2 pounds again. I expect to gain some. But I don't want to gain unnecessarily. Glycogen stores = good. Extra food = extra fat = bad.

So I'm excited it's Friday, if for no other reason than the stock market will be closed for 2 days and hopefully the smart guys in D.C. will get something hammered out by Monday. I have my doubts about that. I think next week is going to be ugly too. Until this is done, not only are the credit markets pretty much ground to a halt, so is our business. You can't very well tell people to invest their money when you don't know where to invest it.

But I'm going to put my hands over my ears and sing "lalalalala not listening!" all weekend. And maybe I'll find some peace in the process.

HUGS & KISSES TO YOU ALL.

EDIT @ 1 P.M.--Just got pack from picking up Sophie at school. She lasted a whole 2 hours. She was fine until they went out on the playground, and the sunshine got to her--it can make her dizzyness worse. She's with my mom at home. And she's drugged up on zyrtec & benadryl. Prayers she gets all better over the weekend.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

148.8 - Food to the rescue? Not today

Sophie woke up this morning feeling dizzy. At first I thought it was just that she got up too fast. But after she finished breakfast and was getting ready to get on the bus, the dizziness hit again. I've made her go to school before when she felt like that, and it was a disaster--she cried on the bus, cried in the office at school, and felt sick the whole time until I'd picked her up. So I kept her home and brought her to work with me.

Thankfully by around 9:30 a.m., she was mostly okay. And a couple hours later, she is walking around, playing, and doesn't have any dizziness at all. I am not sending her to school when there is only 2 hours left (too disruptive to everyone), and I'm keeping my fingers & toes crossed she's OK for tomorrow.

The ironic thing is, just yesterday I was bragging over email to my girlfriend & Sophie's godmother LeAnne, that Sophie seemed all better, that we have only had a couple episodes this year and the last one in May was a one day event. I'd said I thought we could be out of the woods on the whole dizziness thing. That they might be over & done with.

Isn't that always when you get a big wake up call? When you feel overconfident? It's happened more than once in my life, to be sure.

And so it is with my diet, too. Let me first say I am on plan, and aside from the bit of cool whip free I had with my sf jello last night (which is allowed, but the cool whip is not), I have been spot on. And I've been feeling pretty cocky about it.

But this morning, even before Sophie's dizziness hit, I had thoughts racing through my head--do I really have to eat tuna again today? Salad again? Eggs again? (didn't do eggs, though--had grits w/protein powder instead) Why do I have to spend 15 minutes getting all my food prepped for the day, every day? It's not fair. I just want to go to a restaurant for lunch. I just want to eat like a normal person. I just want a bagel and coffee with cream and sugar. I want I want I want.

And then this thing with Sophie happened again. After I figured out it was not a passing spell and she was indeed not going to school, I got her settled down in the family room to rest, and I collapsed on my bedroom floor in tears. It was just more than I could bear at that moment.

I didn't wallow long, maybe 3 or 4 minutes. Then I picked myself up and got the rest of the way ready for work.

And then it hit me that my first impulse to cope did not involve the desire to face plant into a bag of donuts. It wasn't food I thought of to soothe my ache. I was aching, and I was craving relief, but food did not pop into my head as my first line of defense. Prayer did. Half a xanax did (better living through chemicals!). And taking some deep breaths and realizing it was not a big deal if she missed one day of school, that I am so lucky to be able to bring her to work with me, and that no matter what, things would eventually be okay.

I have a feeling that there are going to be more days like this in the near future, where I'm going to feel overwhelmed with grief or stress or whatever is the emotion du jour. And each day I don't depend on food to rescue me, is one more day of strength.

One more day. One more day. One more day.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

148.8 - Just so you know

I'm swamped, but had to pop in to post my weight today. That carb up day did it's job--filled my muscles & body with needed glycogen stores & WHAMMO! a two pound weight gain.

But, unlike at other times when I've been dieting, this time it is NO BIG DEAL. I know what's going on with my body. It's not a mystery why I gained some weight overnight.

And, more importantly, it's weight I needed to gain. My body needs the glycogen to function properly and as a reminder than I'm not starving it, and now it knows that it doesn't have to hold on to my fat stores when I go into a carb down day tomorrow.

I got in a 3 mile run yesterday while Sophie was at swim class. Nothing extraordinary, other than I really didn't wanna but did it anyway.

Not sure what's in store for the rest of the day. DH might take the kids, or not, for my Wednesday night group power weights class. Work is so stressful right now. The folks in D.C. basically hold our future in their hands (not getting into a tangent on the financial markets, but let's just say that we truly are, without a doubt, on the edge of a precipice and it appears that we could go either way), and mentally we are both kind of a mess.

I'm saying lots of prayers for strength and clarity. And at least I'm not burying my head in a pint of Ben & Jerry's.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

146.8 - A New Low

When I woke up this morning, I had a sense that I was going to be under 147 this morning. I just knew it before I stepped on the scale.

I have not been this weight since I was in my early 20s.

And it's weird. Like my body isn't my body yet. Even though it's not quite 8 pounds since starting this new diet, it's almost 8 pounds coming off in the right places. My bones & tendons are starting to show more (not in an anorexic way--believe me, I'm not that thin). My feet are pretty again. I can almost see the top notch of my collar bone on my shoulder. My breast bones are starting to peak through the v-neck of my shirts. My wrists are almost tiny.

Please don't take all this bone talk like I have an eating disorder or I want to be skin & bones. I don't. I just haven't seen the layers under the layer of fat for so many years, and it's fascinating to me. Afterall, healthy women who are athletes have muscle & bone as their primary structures peaking from under their skin.

And they are beautiful. And strong. That's what I'm striving for.

I've been seeing muscles in my shoulders & legs & back for a while. The big muscles that still have a bit of fat over them but still show through. Now I'm starting to look leaner.

The trouble spots are still around--the tummy, the thighs, the hips. I dislike the way I look when I sit down & spread out all over the place. I much prefer the standing tall, sucking it in, shoulders back posture. Lucky for me most of my sitting down takes place at my desk, where I'm by myself all day, and in the bathroom, and the only people who see me in there are my kids, and they could care less (Luke actually enjoys poking on my poochy belly, the silly boy).

The changes in my appearance are motivating. My faster running is motivating. Better fitting clothes are motivating.

The way I feel is the most motivating. I'm not a slave to night time eating right now. I'm not suffering from food guilt. I've got plenty of energy. I'm not (yet) bored with my food choices, and am enjoying what I eat every day. I don't feel deprived. On the contrary, I feel like I'm eating better than I have in a very long time.

And today, I get to have a couple of Carb Up meals, which I'm taking full advantage of to tell my body "Hey look! I'm not taking away all the starchy things you love. I'm not starving myself. You don't have to hang on to all that fat. Let it go, just let. it. go."

Today is day 20 on the new plan. I'm almost to that magic "21 days makes a habit" mark. I'm praying it's a habit that will stay around for a long time.

That's another thing that's really neat about this way of eating, too. I can see me sticking to it for the majority of my life. It's not hard, there are built in cheat days, and I'm not counting anything (except that first week, you don't count carbs, points, or calories--ever). And if I do screw up, I can get back on plan by having 4 carb down days and just get back to it.

For now, though, the plan is to stay on plan. It's a very good thing.

Monday, September 22, 2008

147.6 - 5K PR

Sunday's race was great! I hit a new personal record and finished in 30:18 (avg. 9:46 min/mile). My first mile was also a PR for one mile--9:08. (By comparison, last year I ran this race in 32:03 and weighed 158 pounds.)

It was an overcast, sprinkly day. In the low 60s, and even though it was humid, it wasn't hot and the occasional sprinkles really helped keep things cool. There were over 18,000 people there. I love the Race for the Cure. Such hope & energy.

One bummer--I got some major chafing on my right inner thigh. But for a good reason. My shorts are too big. Yep, my size Medium Champion biker shorts are too big. They don't cling to my legs like they used to and so they road up and my chub rub (which I will likely always have) rubbed too much. That's the first time I've ever had serious chafing, and now I know why runners protect themselves with Body Glide so heavily.

I put glide on my feet & my under arms, but didn't do my thighs because it was a short race and I hadn't had any problems with my shorts during my 8 miler on Saturday (of course, I ran that a LOT slower--avg. was 12:00 min/mile), so didn't even think about my legs. I'll sure remember to do my thighs next time.

And I'm going to get smaller shorts.

I also need to buy another thing of Body Glide. It took about 8 months, but I finally finished off my first stick of glide. Should I have it bronzed? hahahaha.

Today is day 19 on the crack diet. Seriously, I am amazed that I am still on plan. I am not having cravings. I am not eating at night. I have plenty of energy again, and my clothes are definitely getting looser. I am wearing my khakis that just a few months ago looked horrible on me. Today they are almost too big. I have to wear a belt with them so the butt isn't all saggy.

Today is also a carb down day, which means my body is going shopping for fat. And it also means tomorrow is another carb up day. Love. this. diet.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

8 is enough, and Pictures

A quick post to say--I got in a long run today. It wasn't 10, but 8 was close enough. I didn't start running until 11 a.m., and although the temp was low enough (80, I think) the sun was beating down on me by 12:30 and I just couldn't do it anymore.

I even cried when I hit 8 miles. It was one of those "I'm so physically spent I just need to cry" cries. Ever had one of those? Last time it happened to me was in a pilates class, ages and ages ago. I stopped Garmin at 8 miles and walked the rest of the way home just to get myself together.

My carb up day yesterday was awesome. I didn't feel tired & icky like I did the first time, because I had protein with my junky carbs. And I didn't have cravings today (at least, not until the family had ice cream tonight and I got nada. So I had an Atkins chocolate bar instead. Not great, but better than a pint of Cherry Garcia).

Getting my stuff ready for the 5K tomorrow. It should be fun. They are expecting 17,000 people. Luckily I can park at my gym and walk across the street to the mall. Easy in, easy out.


We got the kids pictures done tonight. They are awesome! Here are a few....



Friday, September 19, 2008

148.4 - Up, but not out

So the scale is back up to what it was Monday, but I'm still down 6 pounds from when I started the new diet. My rings were tight when I woke up this morning, and I'm PMSing, so yada yada yada, it's water weight fluctuations.

Whatever the scale says, my size 8 jeans from The Limited fit & feel much better today than they did a few weeks ago. That's the acid test, right?

I updated yesterday's post that I didn't run last night. That bites, but the victory is that I didn't let the PMS take over, I stuck to my healthy food choices, and I didn't eat at night. 15 nights with no night eating--holy cow. That's a record for me.

I have to get in a long run this weekend. Have. to. The Half Marathon is 3 weeks away, and the longest I've run was 9 miles and that was on August 31st. So the pressure's on.

Which, strangely enough, is usually when I deliver.

More rambling... let's see. Tonight we will get together with our core group of church friends for a birthday party for one of the kids (and since it's a carb up day, I get a little piece of cake...with some protein, of course). Sophie has swim lessons tomorrow at 9 a.m. Then the kids have pictures in the park at 4:30 (a family is raising money to adopt a baby, and they take pictures--she's a photographer--for 30 minutes & give you a CD of all the photos with a photo release, for $50. Our friends did this with them last year and the photos were gorgeous.).

And Sunday morning I have the Komen Race for the Cure. If it's cool, I might could possibly be tempted to coax myself into a PR. But if it's in the 70s, forget it. I'll be running to finish and have fun. I don't do fast when it's muggy & warm.

That's all for now. Hope you all have a super duper loverly weekend.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

148.0 - Staying the Course

Last night I got to go to my weight lifting class, and it was excellent. I was pretty strong. Not quite where I was a couple months ago, but I was able to do the Back track (when we do clean & presses--my favorite move of all time--and deadlifts & upright rows) with 3 medium plates, which is a goodly amount of weight. Don't ask me how much though. The plates are in Kg and the only metric I speak is in running terms, ala 5k = 3.1 miles. Last week I only used 2 medium plates. At my peak this summer, I was using 3 mediums plus 1 baby plate.

Food was spot on plan until dinner time. I didn't get home until 7:45, and after the kids were in bed it was almost 9 p.m. I was hungry but not that hungry. It had been a terrible day at work, and I just didn't feel like eating. Weird, huh? This from the chick who a few weeks ago would have plowed through a bag of Chex mix after such a scary day. (If you don't know already, my husband is a financial advisor, I'm his assistant, and this stock market mess is a freaking nightmare right now.)

Anyway, I had a premade Atkins shake at 9, and that seemed to do the trick. Until 10 p.m., when I actually did feel hungry but wasn't about to eat a full meal at that hour. So I had an Atkins snack bar. Not bad choices--just a lot of processed food that is (a) not on the Crack diet plan and (b) not that great for me, health wise. But, like I said, it could have been worse and I'm not beating myself up about it. Just talking through the way things played out.

Today is day 15, the beginning of week 3, and is a carb down day, which is supposed to be when the body goes & gets fat for energy. It makes it easier to only eat one starch serving in the morning when I know it's for a good cause. Plus, I get to have another carb up day tomorrow, so that's something to look forward to.

Tonight I'm going to run. Not sure how long or how far. Mom is picking up the kids, so as long as fortune favors me, I'll be enjoying the weather and getting in a great workout.

For those of you who get the book--I will warn you I've found some inconsistencies. It's a shame she didn't have a better editor or advisor or whoever, because there are some holes in the set up. First of all, I have no idea how exercise is supposed to play into this plan, other than "Just Do It." It may just be my anal retentive nature, but I'd have liked to have had a chapter on how to exercise in relation to the carb cycling--exercise more or less on carb down days? Who knows? Also, on the menu plans she'll say have "a piece of EZ (Ezekial) bread," but a serving of EZ bread is 2 slices. And a couple menu plans don't match other menu plans, so I ignore the ones I know are wrong, based on what she explains in the text. I can live with these issues, though, when I'm getting results.

Also, the Low Carb Friends website is really helpful, to follow a group of ladies also doing this plan. They have links to recipes & their own menu plans, and of course it's a great place to ask questions.

EDIT @ 10 P.M.--FREAKING PMS. I didn't go off plan food wise, but I could not drag my sorry behind out to run. Mom had the kids, so I went to Target & spent way too much money on razor blades, energy drinks (for DH), and granola bar thingys for the kids. On the drive home I just lost all my mojo--it drained right out of me. I went home and laid down on my bed, alone in my house (which never, ever happens) and watched CNBC for an hour and a half. I wanted chocolate BAD and knew it was PMS hormones making me feel lousy. I had an Atkins bar and chilled out, then cleaned the kitchen and cooked some Crack Slaw for the week. Then the kids were home and I snuggled on them and they got to bed quickie quick since they were tired little pups. I just ate dinner at 9:30 p.m. and I've not got any more cravings, but I have that "be still like vegetables; lay like broccoli" feeling. So no running. Dang it. Now I wish I'd made myself go. Another lesson learned. Again.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

147.2 - No bloat!

So my carb up dinner was much better than my carb up snack. I had pasta with meat sauce that DH had made the night before, with a slice of regular wheat toast. The pasta was the protein enriched kind. I also had another No Pudge brownie.

I didn't feel sluggish or bloated like I did yesterday afternoon. And I think the difference is that dinner included some protein and the starches were less refined.

Vickie, the diabetic/carb sensitive carb up meals include protein with each starch. You eat smaller amounts of starch with protein, and over 3 meals. On the non-diabetic carb up day, it's over 2 meals and protein isn't required with the starches. I think I like having some protein with a smaller amount of starch.

It's weird to say, I missed my protein meals yesterday. I guess you can get used to things pretty quickly.

I also got in a run while Sophie had swim class. It was just 3 miles, and I did not feel up to it. I had problems with asthma all day yesterday, even at the office, and at the gym I just never felt like I was getting enough air. I think I've also lost some cardio endurance by taking it lightly the past couple of weeks while on the diet. Ah, well. It will come back.

Today is DH's night with the kids (at least, it's supposed to be, we'll see how the day goes), and I'm planning to go to the 6 p.m. weights class. And it's a Baseline Day on The Diet, which means two healthy starches--one at breakfast and one at lunch.

And look at that scale reading! I really thought it would be up since I had carbs yesterday, and so was very surprised at a loss.

Y'all realize that when I see that weight, I don't believe it. I get on and off the scale THREE TIMES to make sure it's right. I go make my coffee, pee again, and get back on the scale again to make sure it's not lying to me. Today when I got on for Round Two, it said 157.0! But then I got back off and on again, and it was back to 157.2. Is it any wonder I don't trust the numbers? I know, I know. I'm a scale addict. Yada yada yada.

My size 8 J. Jill jeans (they aren't blue-jeans, but are khaki colored and kind of dressy, if that makes sense) that I bought a month or so ago and were a smidge too tight, fit really nicely today. And I measured my waist yesterday and it's at 30.5 inches. I would love to have a sub 30" waist. I never dreamed I'd be this close.

Obsessed over numbers? Me? Naahhh......

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

147.8 - Race-aversary

I finally got in a run yesterday. 3 miles in lovely weather--70, cloudy, breezy. I love this time of year.

Today is my 1 year race-aversary. Pokey celebrated her 2 year race-aversary earlier this month, and it made me take note that my race-aversary would be September 16th. Last year I ran my first 5k, and it was one of the best experiences of my adult life.

It was a Komen Race for the Cure 5k, so it was packed. Over 10,000 people were there that morning. It's a mostly walkers race, so I felt good about being a slow runner. And I felt good being around the amazing energy that comes from thousands of folks celebrating life.

This Sunday I'll be running the Race for the Cure again. I'm part of a team this year--Stephanie's Soldiers--supporting a friend's friend who is only a few years older than me who was diagnosed with breast cancer this year. She's making it so far, and I think has just finished with her last bout of chemo. Anyway, it's not just about me this year, I guess is what I'm trying to say.

But today, it's my race-aversary and I'm just thrilled with how far I've come running wise. How happy I am that I have maintained my weight loss for almost a year, and am even back on track toward my original goal of 145.

Just like Pokey, running has changed my life. I feel so blessed to have made it this far. Thank you for being there with me on this journey.

***
Edit: Today is carb up day on my crack diet. This morning I had grits* & a protein shake. I felt fine. Had a snack of 2% cottage cheese & mandarin oranges* in mid morning. Had a normal lunch of protein & salad. And about an hour ago I had my first carb up snack of chex mix & one No Pudge brownie. I measured out a serving of chex mix this morning so I knew I wouldn't be eating too much. The total calories of this afternoon's snack was 290 calories.

I enjoyed the eating thoroughly, especially the No Pudge brownie (holy no-fat goodness, batman). But now? I feel awful! I'm getting sleepy, I feel bloated, and I feel like my energy has gone down.

Freaking refined carbohydrates are staging a coup on my body. And I was in total denial this was going to happen.

The book has a Carb Up day plan for diabetics or carb sensitive people. I may be following that instead. I don't like feeling like this.

I suppose, all in all, that's a very good thing.

*Grits & fruit are not allowed on baseline or carb down days right now, so they were special treats today.

Monday, September 15, 2008

148.4 - Melting

I feel like this weight is melting off. It's crazy. Today is day 12 on this crack diet and I've been on plan--mostly--the entire time. Saturday night I had a wee indiscretion--some frozen cool whip free & an atkins 2 carb bar. But other than that, I've been pretty much spot on with the food choices.

My energy is finally coming back from adding back carbs slowly. Tomorrow is my first carb up day, and I can't wait. But I must say, other than the occasional chocolate craving, I've not been craving junk food. Not even when I'm stressed, not when I'm tired, not when it's time for bed. It's amazing how the body changes when you feed it primarily proteins, fats, and nonrefined carbohydrates.

I don't think I've ever eaten healthier than I am right now.

Exercise, though, is pitiful. I didn't run once this weekend, and I could give lots of excuses--I didn't have enough time, we had tropical storm-ish winds on Sunday and I couldn't run before church because I could have been impaled by tree limbs, we had a birthday dinner with my dad Sunday afternoon--but the truth is I just didn't make time for it. I'm going to run this afternoon. Hopefully.

At least the weather has finally broken and it feels like fall. Love it.

Yesterday we got the winds from leftover Ike, but no rain. There were tons of trees & limbs down everywhere, and many people are without power, but it's nothing like what folks in the South are going through. At our house, we lost one smallish tree limb and that's it. We lost power while we were at church, but it was back on by the time we got home. We are so very lucky. Most people who are without power around here aren't going to get it back for at least 2 or 3 days.

All these storms and stories of people scrambling for supplies make me want to get my emergency kit in place. I know, I know. I really need to do that. Before it's too late.

Well, I am slammed at work, so I will try to catch up with your blogs later. Hope you are all safe and sound.

Friday, September 12, 2008

149.8 - Triple Whammy

Do you remember the game show "Press Your Luck" from the early 80's where the contestants chanted "no whammies! no whammies! no whammies!" I remember watching it on lazy mornings during summer vacation in middle school. I loved the little whammy guy.

Yesterday was the complete opposite of a No Whammy day. I had three of them stacked against me.

1) I am s.o.r.e. Wednesday's weight lifting class is reeking it's vengeance on my muscles. It's a can barely sit on the toilet kind of sore.

2) We had a low pressure system go through last night, and as the barometer drops, so goes my mood. (wouldn't that be a hoot of a soap opera..."As The Barometer Drops." no? okay, bad idea.) AND I'm already at my mid cycle blahs, so that just doubled the mood droppage.

3) I am still carb depleted. As I suspected, one serving of sprouted bread toast yesterday didn't cut it. I'm still low on energy. It's going to get better, soon, but yesterday I just wasn't there yet.

So with the deck, er, whammies (let's not mix metaphors here) stacked against me, I got in a wicked three miles on the treadmill yesterday.

In 51 minutes.

I don't think I've moved that slowly since before I lost 55 pounds. Not that there's anything wrong with 17 minutes miles. I'm not trying to be a speed snob here. It's just that--I've progressed beyond that pace, and even when I walk I usually keep at least a 15 min/mile pace.

But that was as much as I had in me. I didn't jog once. I did increase the incline a few times to get my heart rate up, because walking at 3.5 mph never got me above a "warm up" heart rate on the treadmill's monitor.

It's all good though. I burned some calories, hopefully worked some of the soreness out of my legs, and today is a new day.

I'm just not sure if I have it in me yet to do much more than that again today.

Food news! I am enjoying my first ever serving of Fage yogurt. Several months ago it was all the rage in our blog world. And I admit, it is quite tasty, even plain. I have the 2% version, and I mixed in half a serving of chocolate protein powder. So it's like a thick chocolate cream cheese mousse. Yummo.

I should note that the crack diet never mentions yogurt--dairy is sorely neglected, which I don't really understand or agree with--but she does allow cottage cheese once a day. I compared the nutrition info on the 2% yogurt with cottage cheese, and they are this close. The yogurt actually has more protein. So I figure it's okay to have a Fage once in a while. Couldn't have it more than that anyway at $2.79 per serving.

A ten mile run is on the training schedule for the weekend. I don't think it's going to happen. I'm going to try to do a 6.2 miler (a.k.a. 10k) that I was supposed to do last weekend, then will get back on track to do a 10, 11, and 12 on the three remaining weekends before my half marathon. It's all good.

TGIF, friends. Safe wishes to anyone reading from the Texas coast. (ha, I first typed Texas toast...guess you know where my mind is.)

Thursday, September 11, 2008

149.4 - The Crack Diet Continues....Week 2, Day 1

First, I just want to acknowledge the significance of today, 9/11. This morning's moment of silence while watching CNBC brought tears to my eyes. I can't believe it's already been 7 years. And I thank God we have not been attacked again.


Okay. Now onto my usual inane diet & exercise talk.

Total weight lost in week 1, carb deplete cycle = 5 pounds. Yippee skippee.

I had toast this morning! Woohoo. Ezekiel bread is yummy.

Debby--I do not get fruit until week 4. I miss it so much, especially my afternoon apple snack. If I stay on this WOE for good, fruit is a once a day thing, in the morning, and it's in place of a starch, even on maintenance (except on cheat days when I can eat whatever I want, and cheat days become a once a week event in maintenance).

The rest of the day is basically like the last 7 days have been, food wise. I just don't have to count carbs. I think I'll be okay. It's really become a habit to eat like this.

Still no night eating. For 7 nights in a row. That's a first.

Yesterday DH picked up the kids (a rare treat for me and for them), and I got to go to the gym and take a weights class. It's been over 3 weeks, and I really reduced the weight on the bar so I could (a) make sure I could get through it without passing out, since I was still sans carbs and (b) not hurt myself. It was still a great workout. I love lifting weights in that class.

I found a crack diet support group yesterday on lowcarbfriends.com. I learned that I will gain some weight back in these next two weeks as my body adds glycogen stores back to my muscles & liver with the added carbs. And I learned that weeks 4 and 5 show big weight loss moves usually. It was helpful to read that in advance of weeks 2 & 3. The last thing I want to do is get discouraged by a move up on the scale and quit.

Today is a swim class day for Sophie, and I'm planning a run at the gym. How far depends on how much energy I have. I'm supposed to be running 4.5 - 5 miles at a time now, but that's just not been possible. And let's face--one 160 calorie serving of a low glycemic carb is not enough to carb me up for a long run.

All in all, though, I'm pretty pleased with the amount of exercise I've been able to do on the carb deplete cycle. There were people in the support group thingy that couldn't do anything at all that week.

That's it from here. Y'all enjoy your day.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

149.6 - First week DONE! And some diet minutia

Well, almost done. Today is day 7 on the Crack Diet, and with it ends the low-carb week.

Please have a caffeinated beverage nearby, as the next few paragraphs may put you to sleep.
The next 7 days are called "Cycle 2" and it's not like I get to eat whatever I want, but I do get to start adding in good carbs. Some days are called baseline days, and I get to have two carbs before 3 p.m. Other days are called carb down days and I eat only one carb before 3 p.m.--this is when we tell the body to go use up excess stored fat, which is going to be important for me to remember if I'm whining about wanting more carbs that day. Cycle 2 has 3 baseline days and 3 carb down days.

The 7th day is a carb up day, when I get to eat two carby junk food-type meals at the end of the day. Carby junk food = pizza, pasta, bagels, carrots (as if I'd eat carrots when I could have pizza), french fries, corn, chips & snacks, crackers, and bread. After the 3rd cycle, I can have ice cream, pastries, alcohol, and cake on carb up days. Woohoo!

Weeks 3 and 4 have two carb up days. After this week, the next three are going to seem like I'm on a food vacation.

I went to the health food store last night (with the kids--it's a small store and I was the only customer there a half hour before it closed, so I had to bribe them with organic jelly beans--what else in a health food store?--to make sure they behaved) and bought Ezekial bread, stevia sweetener, and Bob's Red Mill 10 grain hot cereal.

The list of good carbs is short--black beans or lentils, oatmeal, cream of rice or wheat, Ezekial bread (flourless/millet bread), grits, potato of any kind, and rice. But seriously, any carb at this point is a good carb for me. I hope the Ezekial bread is good. I've never had sprouted/flourless bread. At least I'll get 2 pieces and can make a sandwich if I want to for lunch.

OKAY! Wake up now.
So last night I ran 1 mile and walked 1 mile, and did day 2 of the push up challenge. Still very light on the energy front by evening. Tonight I'm going to try a weights class and hope I don't pass out, ha.

Vickie asked in yesterday's comments an interesting question (she usually has interesting questions--I love how her mind works). Am I building a foundation or am I using this program as a means to get to a number on a scale?

I'd like to think the former. A foundation of no more night eating and reckless snacking is really necessary if I'm going to stay off the merry-go-round of losing and gaining. I'd pretty much already established healthy eating habits, like having protein more often (though not necessarily with every meal) and eating 3-5 veggies/fruits each day, and eating regularly. Drinking water's not an issue for me (I drink at least 3 liters a day, and usually more if I work out).

But to be honest--I am doing all this to reach a number on a scale (and on my clothing tags). What can I say? I make progress when I've got a carrot dangled in front of me, and when I have a very specific plan laid out for me (remember the weights class free t-shirt? which I got yesterday--even though they were out of mediums, dang it, and the large is too big for me :).

It's going to be interesting to see if, after I make it through these 8 weeks and I am (fingers crossed) at my goal weight, will I play Russian roulette & start messing with the maintenance program like I did earlier this year? We'll see.

My biggest hope is that I can once and for all conquer my night eating habit over these 8 weeks. I think if I can do that, then I'll be okay.

Interesting to note that next month (October already?!) will mark my one year anniversary of hitting 155 pounds. LA Weight Loss promoted the idea that if you can keep your lost weight off for one year, then you have a better shot at keeping it off.

If I weigh less than 155 next month, then I think my odds are even better.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

149.8 - Pay off

Nothing is more motivating, to me, at this stage of the game, than seeing a weight below 150.

The first time I saw 149ish was on June 21st. The last time I saw it was on July 3rd. And before those two times, it was in my mid 20s.

I hope the 140s stick around for a while this time.

It's been strange to go to bed without eating anything before hand. I know that probably sounds weird to you all who don't have a night eating problem. Why would you eat right before bed, you might say. For me, it was a comfort thing. A full belly, a carbed-up body & brain, helped me relax & (I thought) sleep better.

The past 5 nights I've stopped eating about 2 hours before bed, and a couple nights it has been more like 4 or 5 hours. For obvious reasons the first few nights were tough. Last night and the night before, I had my vanilla protein shake after dinner, put the kids to bed, did some chores, and it seemed natural to just go to bed and not raid the kitchen.

I know a lot of this has to do with what I'm putting into my body during the day. Low carb eating helps assuage those carb cravings, eventually. I guess I've crossed the hump by now.

I have to admit, it's nice waking up without cotton mouth and not feeling all bloated. Those healthier feelings in the morning do help make the nights easier. (psst, so does half a xanax, but don't tell anyone I said so.)

My running, though, is still suffering from the lack of carbs. Several of you have assured me that the running will come back when carbs come back. Man, I hope so. I could barely eek out 2 miles of running yesterday, and I tacked on .5 miles of walking just to round out a 30 minute workout. I've got a 10 mile run coming up this weekend, and I'm wondering if I'll have enough carbs in me yet to do that one. It may be I move my last week's run of 6.2 miles to this week, and move the 10 miler to next week. My half isn't until October 12, and I've pretty much given up finishing in less than 2:25:00 (I'll save the faster time goal for Indy in May). So the goal isn't speed. It's just to finish. Which I totally know I can do.

Perhaps this race I'll even be at my age 23 weight of 145 pounds. That's a goal I've dreamed of reaching for over a decade.

Monday, September 08, 2008

150.8 - Four days down, three to go

This is the first weekend since June when I haven't had a gain on a Monday.

Today is day 5 of the crack diet, and it wasn't an easy weekend, to be sure. On Saturday night, I smelled a chocolate cookie that my husband had for dessert--smelling was the closest I could get to tasting (yes, he thought I was nuts)--and inhaled it so deeply I swear I must have consumed at least 25 calories just from the aroma.

And yesterday I had some frozen cool whip free, which is not on the fat loss cracking plan, but it was better than sharing some of the chocolate ice cream my daughter and DH had after lunch.

Other than the cool whip, I stuck to my plan. And I stopped eating yesterday at 6 p.m. I've not been very hungry, but I've also not had much energy to do extra stuff, like, you know, run. I didn't get to go on Friday like I'd planned, and Saturday & Sunday were exceedingly lazy.

Thursday I get to quick counting carbs and get to have a carbohydrate other than a vegetable. Same goes for Friday. Saturday I get to eat a whopping two carb foods before 3 p.m. This is a pretty strict plan--the carb selections are limited to low glycemic choices--and I keep reviewing the plan weeks for what's ahead, salivating over the Carb Up days. Any carb at this point will be a welcome carb.

My first CH day isn't for almost 6 weeks. CH=cheat day, when I can eat whatever I want (although the author of the diet book says "don't stuff"--ha!). I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can maintain this thing long enough to "earn" that cheat day.

Results on the scale and in my clothes will hopefully be enough to keep me on the straight and narrow.

One thing that is noteworthy in her book. She talks a lot about how the body expends energy, and how it burns fat. Basically, the last thing the body wants to do is burn fat. So you have to teach it to (which is the point of the first low carb week & subsequent low carb days alternated throughout the 8 week diet). Here's how she explains it: "Think of how you do your weekly shopping, but think of the grocery store as the fat store. Just as you don't go to the grocery store every day, your body doesn't go grab fat that way. Your body wants to hold onto fat, so it won't tap into it daily." That idea really helps me deal better with daily scale readings.

Saturday, September 06, 2008

150.6, already?

Yep, already.

In two days of doing this diet.

I love me some water weight loss.

But, seriously, my clothes have already loosened up. Scary how much water weight actually does impact what your body looks & feels like.

I will see the 140s next week. Holy normal BMI, batman. (BMI, schmee em eye, I know, but it will still be nice to be "normal" when I hit 149.)


We're off to a grown up party now.

In a barn.

But it's going to be fun. Lots of no-kids kind of fun.

YEE HA!

Friday, September 05, 2008

153.2 - One day down....

So the first day on the crack diet (as I'm lovingly referring to it in the short hand) went surprisingly well. I stuck to my food plan, exactly as I'd outlined it. I never got a bad headache, never felt too terribly off, and didn't have massive carb cravings. All in all, it was a good day.

I did only get in 3 miles yesterday. At around 2.6 miles I noticed a significant drop in my energy, and hit a wall. I'm guessing this was related to the no-carb thing, but who knows. Maybe I was just tired.

But I didn't just quit at 3 miles. I did day one (finally, at last, totally late to the party) of the 100 push up challenge. My push up test about a month ago yielded 7 pushups, so I did the second column. It was tough, but doable. I have light soreness today, even in my abs, which surprised the heck out of me. I think I'm gonna like these pushups (esp. since I still haven't made it back to a weights class, and the gym reorganized the schedule so my Wednesday and Friday classes no longer even exist, dang it).

Last night was rough, and if it weren't for this new diet I'd have face-dived into a pile of junk food. Luke woke up at 1 a.m. and had vomited all over himself. It was a huge mess, of course, and the poor little guy felt just awful. I cleaned him up, gave him some Sprite, took his temp (no fever, which was good but unexpected), plopped him on our bedroom floor to watch TV (DH promptly moved to the couch to finish his night's sleep), stripped his bed & washed all linens and his blankie, and then put him in bed with me. Luke, of course, felt fine at that point and was wide awake. Until 3:30 a.m.

Thankfully my mom didn't have to work today and had already planned on coming down first thing this morning, so I didn't have to worry about missing work. Unfortunately, Luke woke up at 6 a.m., and threw up again. I had him in the kitchen, though, and he threw up in the sink (yuck), so at least it wasn't a huge mess to clean up. He had a low grade fever at that point, and I was exhausted.

Sleep deprived and day 2 of low carb don't go together very well, let me tell you. But what's a mama to do?

Today, it finally is starting to feel like fall. Low 70s and overcast--my favorite weather. So even though I'll probably feel tired & whiny, I plan to run this afternoon outside. Just because I can.

Certainly the weekend will be a challenge, diet wise, but I'm telling myself that I CANNOT blow the 2 days I've (almost) completed.


For those of you who are curious, here's what I ate yesterday:
Breakfast
-1 egg w/ 3/4 c liquid egg whites & 1/4c cheddar cheese (1 carb)
-mocha protein shake (3 carbs)
Lunch
-crack slaw (ground sirloin w/ broccoli slaw & yummy sesame oil & spices, sort of like a Chinese dish) (2 carbs)
-salad w/EVOO & 1 T balsamic vinegar (2 carbs)
Snack
-1/2 c cottage cheese (4 carbs)
-1 c broccoli (4 carbs)
Dinner
-vanilla protein shake w/cinnamon (2 carbs)
-chicken breast on salad w/EVOO & 1/2 T balsamic vinegar (1 carb)

Not much, is it? Surprisingly I wasn't that hungry until I got done working out, and then I was starving. The protein shake held me over until I had my chicken breast all cooked up (cooked 2 pounds of it and a pound of turkey), which I ate at 8 p.m. I was as hungry for breakfast this morning as I ever have been. My mocha shake this morning--made with 12 ounces of real brewed coffee!--and my turkey & cheese w/mayo on a big lettuce leaf couldn't have tasted better.

P.S. While I'm doing well and sticking to my guns, I would kill for a bar of Green & Blacks milk chocolate right now.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

154.4 - Get Cracking!

You know you've had it with the treadmill when you opt for a 4 mile run in 90 degree heat and humidity. I just couldn't take another indoor run yesterday, so I bit the bullet and ran in air you can wear. Thankfully it was cloudy so the sun wasn't beating down on me. But there wasn't much of a breeze so there was no relief. On my last mile, I actually poured the rest of my water on my arms to get a brief thrill of coolness.

Needless to say, it was a run as slow as the molasses-like air. My average pace was 11:15, which for a short run is (getting to be) a pretty slow pace for me.

Tonight Sophie has swim team* and the plan for me is 4.5 miles, which is unfortunately indoors, but I'll survive.

The big news on the food front is I started the Crack the Fat Loss Code diet today. Earlier in the week I'd pledged to wait until after the Saturday night party we have, but I just couldn't put it off any longer. So I grocery shopped last night and bought more protein in one shopping cart than I have in the past month. I made crack slaw last night that Jodie recommended (YUMMO, indeed!), planned my food intake for today, ate eggs & cheese for breakfast, skipped my usual coffee with vanilla creamer & sugar (sniff, sniff--right now I am drinking coffee with one packet of sweet & low and it's just not the same), and had a mocha protein shake with instant coffee instead.

I've got the beginnings of a headache, which I'm sure is from not having my usual 4 cups of coffee before 8:30 a.m. (I know, I know). But I'm keeping my eyes on the prize, baby. It took 9 months last year to lose 55 pounds. I can spend 8 freaking weeks on this diet to lose 15 more. The first week is supposed to be the hardest--carbs under 20 grams for 7 days--and the first 3 days are the hardest of the 7.

I can do anything for 3 days. I can do anything for 3 days. I can do anything for 3 days.

Regarding the diet book, on an Amazon.com 5 star scale, I'd give it a 4, and if I could I'd give it a 3 1/2, because (a) she doesn't include any information on exercise or weight training, even though they are "keys" to cracking the fat loss code, (b) there are very few recipes and when you have a restrictive diet like this, I think you need recipes to help people know what to eat beyond grilled chicken & broccoli, (c) she repeatedly says "this is not a diet, it's a lifestyle," which I call bullshit on and find highly annoying. It's a diet. Period. And finally, (d) it's a pretty complicated program. I have no doubt it works--the science behind the plan makes sense, and I've never read anywhere how the body gets its energy sources, first from food, then from muscle, and lastly from fat stores. So I give her kuddos for that. But it's not a diet for the diet novice, by any means. All that said, I still think it will work for me. I'm banking on it.


*Sophie's swim teacher asked her to join the club's swim team! She's at level 4, which is the highest group swim class they offer, and when we went last Monday night to class, Sophie was clearly more advanced than all the other kids in the group. So the swim teacher bumped her up to swim team. Swim team = Tuesdays & Thursdays from 4:30 - 5:30, and every 1st & 3rd Saturday from 10-11 a.m. A lot of swimming for a 7 year old. And competitions are only in the summer, so she's got a lot of time to develop her strokes & stamina. I'm just thrilled that she has found something she loves, that will help instill the habit of doing something physical on a regular basis. That is something I never had as a kid, and you know we always want to do more for our kids than was done for us.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

The tape measure doesn't lie

No weigh in again today. I just couldn't deal with it. I had pizza & breadsticks last night and it was bloat city in my squishy bod.

I did, however, get out the tape measure this morning. Unfortunately that was probably more depressing than the scale would have been. But it's a wake up call.

Since August 7th, the last time I measured, I've gained an inch in my chest, a half inch on my waist, and an inch & a half on my hips. Ugh.

I was so mad at myself this morning, which is probably a good thing. I'm not beating myself up or anything--just ready to do something about it. Really ready. Ready ready.

I've got to be. I've got clothes to wear that aren't fitting right, and that just won't stand, man.

I'm still running--I got in 2.7 miles yesterday and will run 4ish today. But as anyone who's trained for a long race can tell you, you're more likely to gain weight while training than to lose. You just get so hungry after those long runs. Plus you sometimes feel like you've got free reign to eat whatever you want because you're putting in so many miles. But it's not that many miles, and "calories in" are still an issue even when you're a runner.

And I've got to get back to weight training classes. Haven't been in over 2 weeks, and I miss it terribly. So do my muscles. I hope they aren't atrophying too badly.

So I may be starting the Fat Loss Code Cracking sooner rather than later. I just can't let this get any more out of hand than it is.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Good News, Bad News

First, the good news:

I ran 9 miles this weekend, as planned. It was on Sunday morning instead of Saturday, but I still got up at 5:30 a.m. and ran for an hour and 45 minutes. Long slow run, it was. My average pace (I think--Garmin is in the car in my gym bag) was around 11:30. The best part of the run was that I had more in me. I wasn't wasted by the end and could have run another 2 or 3 miles fairly easily. That's a big victory for me, and so is the A.M. run.

I ran 22 miles last week, and a total of 67.1 miles in August. That's the most ever for me in one month.

We had a fun family weekend. Went to a local theme park/water park yesterday for Labor Day. Nobody got sunburned, which is no small feat with our fair haired/blue eyed clan.

Now the bad news:

I have no idea what I weigh today because I ate like a crazy person all weekend and didn't want to face the music this morning. I know I've gained. My skort is tight this morning. Dang it.

Even though I hit a personal best for running mileage this month, I am 2.9 miles shy of my 70 mile goal. I just didn't have it in me to run Friday or Saturday, and figured it was better to be smart and not get injured or burned out.

I'm so swamped at work that I shouldn't even be posting this, but I had to so I could get my head wrapped around all this stuff.

I'm not going to start the Fat Loss Code Cracking until next week. We have a party with clients on Saturday night, and I don't want to be in middle of a diet where I can't drink or eat party food. Which means I have to convince myself that I do NOT get to eat all the carbs I can get my hands on this week, in anticipation of the low carb 1st week.


There's lots more I could put under both categories, but that's the quick brain dump for the moment. I'm behind in blog reading because of the holiday, and miss my bloggy-friend fix. Hope to remedy that as soon as possible.