We took the kids to have our Christmas picture made yesterday afternoon. Now, typically, I'm a big believer in the casual kids-in-front-of-the-Christmas-tree-in-their-PJ's photo for Christmas cards, but these go to our clients and we have a good friend who's a professional photographer and has done our pictures for several years, so he cuts us a deal.
I knew it was going to be a challenge because Luke is 2 and he is all boy and doesn't like to sit still. And it was tough, but we got a few good shots and with the magic of digital photography, my best face will be moved to the picture with the best faces of the rest of the family.
We also had a shot of just Mark and me, for business use. The picture turned out great. When I get the .pdf's, I'll post here.
It was the first time since our wedding that I was really happy with a studio picture of me. Mark even said I looked beautiful. Which made me tear up because I was not feeling beautiful last night....
My daughter and I have been butting heads a lot lately. It's like a teenager has invaded her 6 year old body and taken over. She complains a lot and doesn't like me asking her to do things, like getting up in the morning or going to bed. And I get impatient easily and lose my temper with her. And last night was just ugly and I made her feel bad about herself, and even though we made up, I felt like I'm damaging my kid and I'm a terrible mother.
I'm overly sensitive, she's overly sensitive; I'm strong willed, she's strong willed...it's a lethal combination. After she went to sleep, I still had to go to the grocery store at 9:30 at night. I felt like sh!t and wanted to drown myself in ice cream. Instead of Ben & Jerry's, I bought a Blue Bunny "personal indulgence" serving of chocolate chip cookie dough, which has 340 calories. Not a disaster, but still a big ole dose of my drug of choice.
I've got a book on 6 year olds, and I read a chapter on their behavior that made me feel better. Basically, she's normal, and it will get better as she gets older, and then will get worse again when she turns 11. It said parents need to not be emotional when dealing with this kind of behavior. And to get a break when you need it.
And boy do I need a break.
So Mark's taking the kids tonight and I get a night off. Not sure what I'll do, but hopefully it will include a trip to the gym since I can't run at 4 pm like I usually do (we have clients coming in for a meeting). A night all to myself is pretty rare, and I'm very much looking forward to it. Hopefully I'll find some non-emotional patient reserve deep down inside myself so my daughter will make it to age 7.