Monday, March 26, 2007

Day 37 - Impatient

Shouldn't I be at my goal weight by now? I mean, it's been over a month that I've been "good." I should weigh what I want by now, as hard as I've worked and as well as I've stuck to my plan.

It's funny how a dieter's mind thinks, playing games with the scale, the calendar, the sizes of clothing. I'm so ready to be my goal weight, especially since the weather is warmer and I want to be wearing flimsy flirty dresses.

But no. I'm still in size 16s (although better fitting 16s). I can't wear what I want. The muffin top is still around my middle. Spanx pantyhose is still a required piece of underclothing.

I've got months and months and months to go.

It's a real downer.

The stick-to-it-iveness is what I've always lacked, not just in weight loss. Many a project in my life gets started with great guns, my intentions pure and inspired. Then my interest wanes and I move on to something else. That's simply who I am. Why try to fight it? Why not work with it?

So I've got to figure out a way to rechannel my energy on this weight loss thing, to keep it going. I've been thinking about focusing on upper body weight lifting for a month, to see how much I can build my muscles in 30 days. Perhaps that will be my focus the next few weeks. I'll maintain my food diary and LAWL visits, but stop weighing myself at home, take the spotlight off the scale for a while.

It will start today, this afternoon after work. I'll report back in the next few days.


gustavclarkston said...

You and I are similar, I get bored easily too. Yeah, getting thin and wearing sexy clothes is a cool goal, but after while it gets old and we need to create something new to get excited about. If we keep creating new and exciting goals to get us through the next 4 weeks, then so be it. Right now, I can look at all the lovely goal clothes and want to wear them but it feels like it's so far off, just like you feel. So...right now, I'm thinking about how shocked my dad will be in September when I ride my bike there for the first time, he hasn't seen me in a year and I want to surprise him. He also wants me to ride with him (he has a Harley) to his brother's house to visit and I don't want to ride up looking like an apple on my bike. I want to treat myself to a new, slim, fitted bike jacket before the trip and ride up looking sleek and lean. I also am seriously considering signing up for and walking the Columbus OH marathon coming up in mid October this year. I don't want to do that fat either. Halloween parties in October and wearing a sexy french maid costume instead of a huge flannel jacket and a Jason mask...joining a dating service at the start of the new year, going out dancing for New Year's instead of hiding out at home, etc. etc. Keep coming up with goals that excite you, even if you have to create new goals every few weeks. We may have short attention spans for a long reaching goal, but we can do this, we just have to keep our brains happy and excited...

Good luck!

Vickie said...

Do you think that you are a perfectionist? Because one of the traits of a perfectionist is not having realistic expectations of how long things take to accomplish. I heard this on a radio show and wish that I had heard all the other traits that they listed.

Laura N said...

Yes, Vickie, I'm a total perfectionist. I'm also the other "p," a procrastinator. I procrastinate, I think, because I know whatever I do won't be perfect, so I just don't start it.

Now I'm over the procrastination of getting this diet thing going again, but the perfectionism is definitely an obstacle. I've not worked on that, though, so maybe I'll do some research on it.