Thursday, November 20, 2008

149.2 - Tequila & Cookie Dough

Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in.

Yesterday. Sucked.

I didn't get to go to the gym or run. I barely got to eat right. The markets & the world are scaring the crap out of me (way too many people using the "D" word on CNBC). I'm overwhelmed by how much work Thanksgiving is going to be. My husband is a stressed out mess. I yelled at my kids last night and made my daughter cry.

And when I just couldn't take anymore, I turned to Cuervo and Toll House to soothe my nerves.

While I only had one margarita and 4 squares of break & bake cookie dough, I still felt icky about going back to the food for comfort. I'm just no where near mature enough, diet wise, to completely move away from The Food when I'm in The Despair.

I know I'm not alone in this need, so thank you in advance, oh fellow commiseraters, for your empathy. And those of you who don't eat when you're emotionally a mess, I am in awe of your fortitude.*

Today's not much better on the freaked out front. I've eaten better and plan to do something tonight at the gym while Sophie swims (as long as things don't blow up at work like they did Tuesday and we get to go to the gym). So at least I'll get some release and/or endorphins from that.

But I don't see the worry letting up anytime soon. I really really hate this.

At least, thankfully, for now, we are all healthy. I just pray we don't lose that.


*I looked up this word to make sure it was an apt choice here. It is. I think I'm going to start praying for this, too:

for·ti·tude
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin fortitudin-, fortitudo, from fortis
Date: 12th century
1: strength of mind that enables a person to encounter danger or bear pain or adversity with courage

12 comments:

MCM Mama said...

{{{HUGS}}} No other advice, but lots of commiseration. I had a beer and chocolate last night because I needed to do something nice for myself, so I can totally feel your pain.

Marcy said...

(((BIG OLE HUGS))) chica!

Jill said...

Right there with ya sister, except mine was a big honkin Rice Krispy Treat.

Hang in there kiddo. I"m on my way out the door now, but I'll check you out on the FB tonight and leave mo betta words of encouragement!

And look on the bright side, at least it wasn't heroine and crack you ran to!

Helen said...

It's very HARD not to be scared about the economy if you even have half an ear to the ground. I had to stop watching CNBC and stop reading some stuff on-line because I was just getting too freaked out. And I drown that in booze (and ice cream sometimes), so I totally relate...

Hang in...I can't say that I'm sure things will get better, but we will be ok. :-)

Jodie said...

I'll come over for Jose and dough anytime. I have absolutely no advice for you, I turn to food immediately.

Stay healthy girl, have fun at the gym tonight.

Grumpy Chair said...

I love that word - needed to read it.

Hang in there Laura. I think that anything eaten (cookie dough, chips, worms) with tequila is automatically balanced out.

Vickie said...

loved the definition!

Vickie said...

You might enjoy this one -she is realising similar things:

http://escapefromobesity.blogspot.com/2008/11/you-dont-have-to-gain-weight-when-youre.html

don't know if you read Lyn every day.

Vickie said...

More with "fortitude " that you might enjoy pondering:

noun courage, strength, resolution, determination, guts

(informal) patience, pluck, grit, endurance, bravery, backbone, perseverance, firmness, staying power, valour, fearlessness, strength of mind, intrepidity, hardihood, dauntlessness, stoutheartedness

Vickie said...

FYI - my post (today) isn't about you - it is actually copied from a reply I put on someone else's blog last week.

Cindy...154 said...

I am happy for you to be in the 140's. I am hiding from the Despair. My company's stock went so scarily low this week it is freaking me out. We were holding up pretty good but this week it went way down. I am trying to stay upbeat but there are whispers and closed doors and everyone is on edge. The subsidiary I work for is always up for sale, and I can only hope that nay change will work out good for me, it usually does. I know how stressed you must be and you are not alone. When I had to work from home two days with my daughter's dizzy spells and a bizzare situation with her doctor's office I pretty much let all my food guard down. I admire YOUR fortitude!!! And all our fortitude. We have it. Even when we eat cookies. Sometimes lately I wish I could drink tequila...

LG said...

I understand and I wish I could stop using food as a crutch when things are bad (or when things are good and in-between). It's not a question of maturity. I think it's something we've developed as a coping mechanism and made it into a finely tuned engine for us. If we get rid of the engine, what do we have? And in times like these, it's hard to find another thing to lean on.

So dust yourself off, do good things like you have planned and remember, tequila and cookie dough just might be the hottest cocktail in Hollywood or NYC. :-)