Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Size 10s, Slightly Manic Weekend, Love your body (163.6)

I went shopping yesterday for new clothes.  Christopher & Banks has everything 40% off.  My size 12 pants from there were dragging the ground b/c they were hanging off my waist.  I fit in the size 10s just fine and I can wear them until I'm down another 8-10 pounds, which will probably be through winter.  I've been a medium on top for a while now. 

I am trying not to make a big deal out of the smaller size, as I wrote about last week.  The styles are simple & age appropriate. I'm not walking around thinking "woohoo! size 10s!"  I'm not doing a style show for my husband (although I did show him how my pants were falling off me and he said to go buy new pants).

It's been almost 2 years since I've been able to wear size 10s.

I'm on day 14 of abstinence.

***
I decided yesterday that I am going to do the Princess Half Marathon at Disney next February. We have enough reward miles for a free Delta ticket. 3 other girls are going again, and I need a race to train for so I will make myself run.  It just hasn't been happening.  A goal is what I need to make myself move.

***
Had an interesting weekend.  I was feeling slightly manic.  Had a ton of energy--cleaned out Sophie's room and the front room.  This involved several bags of trash & stuff for goodwill, and moving furniture.  I also had to sort through years of pictures and school memorabilia on the desk in the front room.  All in all, I spent about 10 hours over Saturday & Sunday working on two rooms. 

I also stayed up Saturday night until 2:30 am watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.

Monday was the crash. I was exhausted & felt back to normal/slightly down. I also was fighting off a virus Mark & Luke both had (headache, body ache, chills).  Tuesday was blah too.  I'm more normal today.

I found it interesting that the (slightly) manic thing has started again.  Maybe we need to adjust the lamictal, not sure.  I like feeling UP, though, in a way, because I feel so good when it happens.  I understand why some bipolar sufferers don't want to take meds.  The manic phase that they go through is much greater than what I feel.  Mine isn't out of control, I don't go on spending sprees or do stupid stuff.  But I can definitely feel the difference.

***
It's National Love Your Body day.  I have a hard time loving my saddlebags, but the rest of me I'm (mostly) OK with.

I've written before that if I didn't have saddlebags, I'd probably not care about losing weight.  They are what motivate me to lose weight so I will look proportionate.  There are several actresses who are tiny who have saddlebags--their backsides are small & not misshapen (like mine are with all the the extra fat), but they are distinctly pear shaped.  When I was at my smallest, I still hated my backside. I hope this time when I lose my extra weight that I can embrace my behind and not be so obsessed over it.

No matter what I weigh, I will likely always wear Assets/Spanx with dress pants and dresses. They squish in the bumpy parts so I look curvy and not misshapen. God bless Sara Blakely for inventing those things.

6 comments:

Vickie said...

Is the difficult lady going to Florida again?

Laura N said...

No difficult lady, thank goodness.

Vickie said...

That is thank goodness!

Shauna said...

You're doing so well Laura, really kind and steady progress. You inspire me :)

Cindy...154 said...

Congrats on the size change even though you are low key about it. Good to stay level headed. Cleaning things out always makes me feel good. I notice that when I am losing weigh I sometimes have trouble sleeping and feel a little manic.

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