I know I know. It's been too long. I've been meaning to post for days. I've not been in a good place. No surprise I guess since my silence here generally means I'm not doing great.
The holidays got me way off kilter. Too much food, not enough time to myself, not enough days in front of my SAD light, too much illness. I wasn't sick but Mark was, for basically a full month. It all takes a toll.
Then Sophie got the stomach flu Saturday and a migraine Sunday that just let up today. She went to school Monday for a couple of hours. I picked her up and the ride in the school wheel chair to my car made her so dizzy she threw up leaning out of my car onto the sidewalk.
Add to that work uncertainty (we are in the midst of making decisions on changing things) and general moodiness from hormones, the moon, or what have you, and it's no wonder I've been off.
So I went to my therapist today. It helped. I'm going back in a month. I also have been in front of my SAD light three days in a row. That helps.
I ran 8 very hard miles last Saturday but hadn't run before or after (until the 2.5 miles I did on the treadmill today). The 8 were hard because you can't run a 10 mile run one Saturday, do nothing all week, and then run 8 miles the next Saturday.
Also, my asthma kicked up big time and I wasn't carrying my inhaler. I haven't needed it during a run this year. Before a run, I always use it (albuteral), but usually only need it with me on long runs. Which in hindsight--duh. 8 miles is a long run. I am going to start carrying it with me again.
The proud news on the running front is I ran 5 miles non stop on the 10 miler and 6 miles non stop on the 8 miler. Not taking walk breaks is a big deal for me. The other good news is I haven't gained a bunch of weight. I was 168.6 yesterday. I didn't weigh today and it is probably a bit more. But I know what I need to do to get going in the right direction again.
A New Year doesn't do much for me. For me, the build up is too much. The expectations too high. The disappointment factor too great. Too hot and then too cold. Too much room for failure.
So I look at January as what it is-- 3 months more until Spring. And the days are already getting longer. I miss the sun and the green and the warmth. I am ready to bloom when March gets here.
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