Monday, February 04, 2013

"New" dresses (151.4)

So last night I was thinking of what I could wear to a wedding we are going to on Saturday.  I wear mostly black, grey, and blue clothes (seriously, my wardrobe needs a makeover) and nothing currently in my closet is festive enough to wear to a wedding in February. 

I remembered a dress from my skinny years that is pink and black, with an empire waist and deep-V neck and back.  It was in one of the "these clothes don't fit" underbed boxes in Luke's room.  I dragged out the box, found the dress, and tried it on.

It fits perfectly.  It's a size 8.  I haven't worn it in over 3 years. 

I have several other dresses that I didn't give away, all size 8s, so I tried them on too.  They all fit. 

Today I am wearing the brown dress that I remember looking at last year and thinking "my gosh, you were skinny when you wore that."

This weight loss has snuck up on me.  I am still carrying a lot of weight in my hips and legs--more so than I did when I was this weight the last time.  And I figured a lot of stuff wouldn't fit (my size 8 capris, for example, are still too tight--or at least they were a few pounds ago; I'll try them on again before I leave for Florida in a couple of weeks) .  My dresses are A-line and the hip area is forgiving; the top portions are fitted at the waist.  Stacy & Clinton would be OK with my dresses, ha.

I can also wear my size 8 brown wool coat.  I tried it on a few months ago and it was super tight.  It's dress length, fitted at the waist with 3 buttons, A-line shape.  It's not snug at all and looks great.

The first time I lost weight I was in the mall every time I lost a few pounds.  I watched my clothing sizes like a hawk and enjoyed getting the emotional "hit" when I bought clothes in a boutique store like The Loft or J.Jill. 

This time, I decided not to make this all about the clothes, to not spend the excess money, to only buy what I need to function during the week.  It has been fun, though, to go through my skinny clothes and have them start fitting.  Being this size and getting into clothes I love motivates me to keep in shape and watch my food.

But I am very aware that I need to be careful about how I react to the attention I might get from the now-noticeable weight loss.  That attention likely contributed to my derailing last time.  That can't happen again.  At least I am aware of it this time and have a therapist and a sponsor I can talk with.

For today I'll just enjoy my "new" clothes and be thankful.


Vickie said...

You are very fortunate that you didn't give everything away, so many do. How lovely that you have things you really like that fit right when you need them.

The biggest factor in the reactions, in my opinion, is NOT to reinforce them. Change the subject immediately and positively so the person does not get "let's talk about Laura's body" etched in their memory/response.

I made do with as little (clothes) as possible all the way down the scale. Just a couple pants, a couple good bras, etc.

I didn't buy anything major until I had been at my final weight(s) for a while, to see how my body settled. I think it takes a while if one is really working on tone.

And then when I did start to buy, I spent a lot of time trying things on, without buying. I learned what worked and didn't work. I stayed away from sale racks and tried on a lot of styles. Then when I knew what I wanted, it was okay to see if any of it ended up on sale racks.

My wardrobe is mostly filled in now - funeral, wedding, every day, whatever the reason or the season, I have things to wear.

Laura N said...

I needed that reminder, Vickie, of steering the conversation elsewhere. Thank you!

Jill said...

It's so nice to go shopping in your own closet (or under the bed, whatever works!). I have never like the advice of "give away all your clothes that don't fit" because you have no idea what's going to happen in your life. I'm not saying "be a hoarder" but having a few things in different sizes is helpful I think.

I agree with Vickie - say "thank you" and then move on. :)

jen said...

I understand the double-edged sword of attention. It fires up my need for approval but also the "who do you think you are!" voice. Yikes.

Vickie said...

I do not even say thank you.

I change the subject immediately.

Nip it in the bud.

Vickie said...

I think it extends to all parts related to weight loss too. Because if you are talking to the general public or talking to someone who does not choose to make strides forward in their own life, it is going to create weirdness.

I guess I am saying, it is okay to talk about running with another runner. But not with the general public. Ditto with food choices. Etc.

Don't give anyone the impression that it is open season, in front of your face or behind your back to discuss your body or your choices. ESPECIALLY men if that is what bothered you in the past.

Vickie said...

how was the wedding?