Tuesday, August 20, 2013

No pie for me (152.6)

Saturday night our church had a dinner/concert that I was in part responsible for coordinating. We have a small endowment called Christianity and the Arts, and the event was a fundraiser. In the past couple of years, the endowment has paid for Bach concerts that our choir director, who is also the choral director/professor at the private university in town and is very accomplished and talented, has put together. They are well attended and unique to our area.

This was the most ambitious and succcessful fundraiser we've had. 77 people attended. It was catered and, by all accounts, the food was outstanding (I helped wait on tables, so didn't eat). The musical performances were goose-bump worthy.

The event started at 6. I got there at 4 to help finish setting up. Part of the set up was cutting the 14 pies the caterer made.

There were 8 different kinds of pies, including unique pies (lemon buttermilk & butterscotch) and my old favorite, chocolate. I cut pies for about 20 minutes. I got pie on my fingers. I served pie to the table I was assigned to wait on when it was time for dessert.

I had zero desire--absolutely no temptaiont--to eat a piece of pie.

They looked lovely. Everyone was oohing and ahhing over them. I let fond memories fill my head, of eating chocolate pie when I was a kid that my grandmother made especially for me. For grandma and me, chocolate pie=love.

And then I let in memories of eating half a pie or more at one time; of sneaking a 3rd and then 4th piece, hoping no one would notice. Then feeling sick and helpless and berating myself for eating so much. Those memories kept me from eating pie Saturday.

More than anything, though, it's the OA program and abstinence that kept the desire for pie away.

I may not have perfectly clean abstinence right now. But I have perfectly clean abstinence when it comes to dessert. And for that I am grateful.


Vickie said...

We probably all have a "pie" in our background. Good job. I think it is 100% kinder to oneself to abstain than try to moderate. And people just do not get that. If someone is at goal weight, been maintaining there for many years, I believe them when they talk about moderation. But most people adamant about moderation are not at goal. . .

Laura N said...

Exactly. Moderation isn't possible for people with food addiction. That's like asking an alcoholic to moderate his alcohol intake. And most people with food/weight issues are in denial of having an addiction.

You might be interested to know there are a few anorexics/bullemics in my OA group. One lady who's anorexic gave a talk a couple of weeks ago. it was fascinating to hear what she went through. you were the first person I know who talked about anorexia being the same issue we have, just in a different manefestation. it's very true.