Friday, August 06, 2010

Day 1. Again.

Thank you all so much for your supportive & kind words. You gave me exactly what I needed. What awesome, amazing friends you all are.

The rest of this week has continued to go well for Dad, and for my sister. We have a new hospice nurse (because we moved from one county to another, and the nurses don't cross counties because of the miles involved) and this nurse (who is a man) has experience with ALS patients. He's really been a God send, because he knows more about what will make Dad comfortable and what can help deal with his body's changing needs. The nurse told my sister yesterday that the bottom half of Dad's lungs are no longer working, and he'll be surprised if Dad makes it another 3 months.

The nursing director at the nursing home said they've had ALS patients before, but they never get to this advanced stage--they die before they get this bad. But, I think because Dad has lived in his wheelchair for the past 10 months--always in a semi-vertical position--he's been able to continue breathing because there hasn't been pressure on his lungs. ALS patients usually die because of respiratory failure; when Dad is reclined in his wheelchair all the way back, he can't breathe. His lungs will fail completely, eventually, regardless of whether he's horizontal or vertical. It sounds like such an awful way to die. Knowing Dad, he's going to make it as difficult as possible for himself & for us.

But. Things are letting up a bit with him, I guess. At least for now.

Yesterday I declared I'VE HAD IT, once again. I made up my mind, again, to get back on a plan, again. So I went grocery shopping last night and bought the foods I need to do the Wendy Chant plan, only I'm going to try her new one "Conquer the Fat Loss Code." It doesn't have that awful carb deplete week. The last 3 weeks are tougher than the first 5 weeks. This first week has enough carbs that it doesn't make you want to collapse from carb fatigue (if you know her plan.....the first 2 weeks are -- 2 carb downs, 1 carb up, 2 carb downs, 1 carb up, & 1 baseline). I'm sure I won't drop 5 pounds in one week like I would on the "Crack the Fat Loss Code" plan, but that's OK. I have more than 5 pounds to lose anyway. I weighed a mushy 165.4 this morning.

Day 1 is today--yes, a Friday, which is bizarre, but I am done with the "I'll start tomorrow" BS. I just can't take it anymore.

I hope I remember that feeling tonight at 10 pm when the munchies kick in.

If I can be consistent, start running and doing some weights work, by the time the weather cools off around here I could be back in my size 10s & 8s. That would be a lovely, awesome, fabulous place to be.

7 comments:

Jilligan said...

I need to get back on plan also. I am glad to hear you are getting some relief with your dad's situation. Good luck with conquering!

Jill A said...

You're so funny with the "again" stuff, but "again" is better than "never started" ya know? And I am sooooo right there with you - 166 pounds baby!!! You're going to kick @ss this time, I can feel it! :)

I'm glad your dad has a nurse who knows how to really care for him. I think that will be such a load off of your mind (and everyone else's).

Vickie said...

hot tea with lemon - try that at night - make sure NO caffeine of course. And add lemon to your water - makes a difference - I think.

and two weeks ago I had a bad dizzy week - could not be flat on my back and could not be upside down if my head was going backwards (like a back bend) but was fine upside down forward (like a headstand). I realize i was upside down either way, but it was the direction I WENT that created the dizzies. It lasted one week and then went away again.

Vickie said...

Sophie?

Cindy said...

The new Wendy program sounds better, I had depressive episodes on the carb deplete. Hang in there, happy day one, and just keep starting over if you have to. It's been an enormously difficult year for you. You are going to be ok.

Helen said...

How are you doing? Just checking in... :-)

Vickie said...

wondering about you - time to write?