OA

I started going to OA last Monday. Tonight was my 3rd meeting.

I had someone close to me who is in AA tell me I was talking like an
addict. I knew I was addicted to sugar. But I didn't think of myself
as an addict with a disease.

It's a very different approach to all this food business when you
acknowledge you have a disease.

Not a food problem. Not a lack of will power. Not a disorder. A disease.

OA says this is a disease just like alcoholism is a disease. That is
not an easy idea to wrap my head around. But I'm trying.

So I'm going to meetings, Monday nights and Saturday mornings when I can.

There are a lot of thin people at the meetings--a testament to how the
program does work AND that you're never cured. You have to keep going
and working the program.

There are a lot of men there. I had no idea I could learn from men on
food issues.

No one under the age of about 35. All middle aged and older. I met a
woman tonight who has been abstinent for 20 years--she started OA at
age 21. Several others who have more than 10 years in the program.
Many who are several months to a year or so in. A few newbies like me.

Last Monday at my first meeting there was a woman there who has kids
at the same performing arts studio as Sophie. We had just talked at
length for the first time a few weeks ago at the studio. So when I saw
her there and she saw me, we were both surprised. In a good way. In a
"hey! I'm not alone!" way.

We "click" and have a lot in common. She's been going to OA off and on
for 3 years. We got together Sunday and walked and talked for an hour.

I went back to the meeting tonight in no small part because we said
we'd see each other there. Accountability.

It's early in the process but I like what I'm hearing. It's free, it's
supportive, and I'm not alone anymore. I have "real life" people who
understand what I'm going through.

Not that blog friends aren't important to me--you all are. Obviously,
though, I need more.

It will be hard work that I'm frankly not sure I can do. Or am ready
for. I just know I have to do something. And this seems like the right
path.

For now, it's one day at a time.