My Halloween Costume

I dressed up this year for work.  Halloween is a big deal at the college. People can wear costumes all week.  I only dressed up today.  Last year, I didn't dress up at all, and was the only one who didn't. So there was no way I wasn't going to this year. 

The coat was my mom's (faux) from when I was a little girl.  I had the dress from a work event with Mark a few weeks ago.  I bought the wig, gloves & cigarette holder from Amazon (separately) for a total of $25.  Sophie had green eyeshadow and I had the lipstick.  So an easy costume to pull together.  And it's a big hit.  Especially since we have a Vet Tech program with doggies in the Kennel.  Muwahahaha!  :) 

starting over is humbling (172.2)

So your advice, Vickie, about not pushing myself and over training came at a great time.  I had mild shin splints the day I read your comment, and I was ticked about it.  I had gone for a long, fast outdoor walk with a little jogging thrown in on a Friday, and by Sunday my shins were really super sore. I needed to do more miles to stay on track for my (self imposed) "training schedule," but your comment slowed me down.  It would do me no good to keep tearing my muscles & tendons with further pavement pounding, so I just rested until they healed. 

And I brought my training indoors to my treadmill and slowed down to a snails pace.  And I mean slow.  20 min miles last week (3.0mph). Tuesday=2.5 miles in 50 mins.  Wednesday=2.0 miles in 40 mins.  Those were my only two workouts last week.  And I felt like a freaking old woman.  My shins didn't hurt, but it still pissed me off.  So I made sure to eat well and I went to my OA meeting on Saturday morning.  My goal is to get this extra weight off so I can get faster and not be in pain. 

I did do an hour on the TM yesterday with a faster walking pace (I varied it from 3.0-3.5mph), with five or six running intervals thrown in. I ran at a 5.2 mph, couple of times pushed it to 5.5. The running felt amazing.  Nothing hurt. I felt strong and excited to be running again.  Of course after about 90 seconds I was struggling to breathe, and at around 2 minutes I had to slow back down to a walk. But that's how running begins. You don't go from 3.0 to 5.5 mph nonstop overnight. 

Food is much better.  I started cooking again, which I know sounds lame but I really have been super lazy on the food front and just eating what Luke eats or what Mark cooks and lots of frozen and restaurant foods.  I pulled out a couple of old Roni favorites (her greenlitebites website is wonderful), and even came up with an easy couscous/veggie recipe myself (cook couscous in veggie broth, then add chopped 1/2 cucumber, 1 red bell pepper, 1 carrot, add a big bunch of chopped cilantro--that's it. I added some avocado and you could also add black beans).  Sophie & Mark enjoy my cooking; Luke not so much--he's beyond picky (not even going there). 

I still am struggling with needing SOMETHING at night before bed.  So that is what I am going to work on with my sponsor now that I'm going to be working OA again.

I meet with my nurse practitioner this afternoon about my meds. I'll report back. 

Sophie has high school open house this and next week.  She doesn't want to go to the school in our district. She can choose any public school in the county, and we have several charter schools to chose from. So she is looking at one of the toughest charter schools that has an International Baccalaureate program (it is in downtown) but has limited number of spots and usually a lottery system to determine who gets in (there is an application process with an essay and everything).  And then another public school which also has the IB program; my good friend used to teach English at this school before she moved out of state. The principal at this high school has won multiple awards.  I had a student in my office today who went to both of these schools, and she loved the public school and the principal.  At this point the charter school is her first choice with the public school as back up if she can't get in. 

Still working with Mark 1 to 1.5 days a week.  It's going OK. I think he still wants me to work for him more, but that's not going to happen any time soon. For now the college is working with me to keep my hours flexible so I can do this.  They haven't indicated that this is going to change, and while it may not continue indefinitely, there isn't a date as to when it's going to stop in the near future. 

SSRIs are not my friends

I've learned my lesson again. The hard way. I cannot take an SSRI without gaining a crap ton of weight in a hurry. No matter the studies, no matter how fancy or expensive. My metabolism, my brain, my body, whatever--they just don't get along with SSRIs.

I started tapering off topamax in March. I gained about 4 pounds by the end of June. Not great but no bigs. Then started on Brintellix on July 11. By August 23 I had gained 7 pounds. By Sept 30 I had gained another 10 pounds. Yes 17 pounds in less than 3 months! I got up to 177. And I was done.

My appetite had increased some and I was eating more but not that much more. It was exactly what happened the year I started Prozac when I was 27 and I gained 40 pounds in a short time.

Well I'm done. I'm weaning off Brintellix. No drug will make me happy enough to offset the depression from gaining back 50 pounds.

And today I signed up to run the Indy half marathon on May 7. I'm going with a girl from the college who recently lost 80 pounds and took up running. She's really excited.

Will post more soon.